They say time heals all wounds, but if you don't know the cut is slicing slowly through your heart, then the scar that is left might as well never be acknowledged. My time was long and filled with both apathy and spiritual development. She flourished with laborious and arduous pursuit for what she desired. My work was like a dying plant stuck in the shade desperately reaching for the light just next to it. She kept her spirit and body bright, a relentless and endless race with no care to see the sight of a horizon. While I myself, stepped in the waters of alcoholism, huffed the fog from the burning forest with invigorating pleasure, and snorted satan's snow to no benefit of my own. Though my creativity swam towards the light out of the abyss, I loved shredding near it's surface, wading at it's shores. And throughout this eleven year period, I had totally forgotten about my love for her back in my youth. In that timespan, I had thought I found true love, but to no avail, and a true woe it was being
heartbroken. ALAS! I came upon the one I wish I originally had the courage to open up my heart to, to break out of my timid nature, and maybe the eleven year lapse of memory of that one lovely beauty would never have happened, maybe near degradation to oblivion may have never happened. But, wait, FUCK THAT! Why speak of such things so morosely? It was the best to finally remember her, getting out of the miasma of doubts and thoughts of past failures. For some reason beyond my comprehension at this moment, her accomplishments lit back up something in me that I lost in the eleven years of the forgotten love I had for her. To think, I could continue on without doubts, retain my courage, and remain utmost confident by what I desire most. WRITE! I sketch out the words on paper, then go to the computer to craft it together the best I can. I should never have forgotten the love I had for this woman, for if I didn't, I would maybe have had a better mind set. I will never be lost again, because of that damn smile, that damn happiness I saw in her face, her success, her goddamn accomplishments. I may never get to meet her again. Alas, I must accept this as truth, and I do, the same acceptance I have to never give up on my writing. Time to dry up; I'm no Charles Bukowski for fuck sake, and I don't want to end up like Jack Kerouac. Shit, I know the world is run by a bunch of fucking greedy assholes, and it's the masses that make it worse by directing their attention those same damn greedy assholes tell them to pay attention to. But, goddamnit, it ain't hard to breathe oxygen, and take all the whiney bitching from members of the stupid masses, just so you can feed yourself - Fuck, sorry about that, I was getting off track. Where was I? Oh, yeah, it only takes a smile from a beautiful person to make your day, and hopefully a lifetime.
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