3 finger bullet

I was a passivist with 192 confirmed kills in the war
and all the friends I made during it were dead
each died before my eyes

They came home in body bags
while I came home with medals

Three days after coming home I bought a bottle of Wild Turkey
drank three fingers
put a bullet in a revolver my father gave me when I came home
spun the cylinder
pressed the barrel to my right temple
pulled the trigger

Click

Drank another three fingers of Wild Turkey
put another bullet in the cylinder
spun it
pressed the barrel to my right temple again

Click

Drank three more fingers of Wild Turkey
put a third bullet in the cylinder
spun it
pressed the barrel to my right temple

I didn't hear a thing

I woke up six months later in a hospital
hearing the beeps of my heart monitor
and the sound of my breathing

Haven't touched alcohol
nor a bullet or a gun since waking up.

Suffering Moneyfuckers

There's a fact most don't know about
when learning, there maybe no doubt
that procuring money in vast sums
in a moment, is as fun
-- not near as lame --
as the after effect of snorting cocaine

So lame, so lame
-- yet to most --
the most sane
to feel like one has snorted cocaine

For these fools who get ecstatic
at looking at a screen with a high number
would make a layman sick
to see the excitement of this moneyfucker
worse than a motherfucker
whom honestly is a true lover

The moneyfucker's take money paper
and wipe their cum
and denounce the wisdom of their father
a true sign they're a moneyfucker

To think they fuck money while
snorting cocaine
still in denial
they're in danger of an overdose
that not need to become verbose

For the true sane need not realize
that they are the true wise

The suffering moneyfuckers
are better off than motherfuckers
For them, true love is not in greed
because they're deluded into thinking they're freed.

Why I lie

I am a real loner
rather would be secluded
from others I've met who feuded
such was my opinion that they dishonor
the lives around them
which is a mirror before them

I did realize there's joy in it
by a miraculous occurrence I gave a shit
to acquire company to rid
my recluse behavior
supposedly - I did think - this person be my
savior
away from the life of degrading
unwavering labor

The person did criticize
and demised
my words and thoughts
the ones I rarely expressed out loud
for which I was hardly proud

Company got up to leave
to drop me without any notion to
grieve.

"No. Please, please no,"
I said in plead
"Don't leave me alone."

"But you seem to want to drown,"
the company said
"I want no part of your
maelstrom."

"I lie!" I yelled
"I lie because one day
I will die and that's what
I will always say."

I lied and lied
because this company
I convinced to stay
would be at my side
on my last day.

Mingling Flock

I'm both black and white
setting out to set things right

Bigots irritation
of total integration

Proof we are one another
built by God to fuck each other
even two brothers
and two drunk sisters
sharing each others riches
all the while treating each other like bitches

I'm both black and white
here to set what's right
the Bigot I won't treat quite right
Black or White
I'll pound into their head of what I have said
to get what needs to be done without a fight

Before we can begin our race
to the farthest space
there needs to be a real integration
a time for desegregation
unite foolish nations
for we are God's creation
made for universal fornication.

Disillusioned Opinion

I hate those who say, "I've got a solution to your problem."
though your problem is not their problem
they feel the need to solve it
as if the moment after you finished telling them your problem
they've imagined being you and solving it

The problem with this world is that people think they can solve
everyone's problem by just expressing a solution
but if that were true, then why are there still problems
A wise man once said that the saying about being
in another man's shoes would be impossible
so impossible, one could not imagine it authentically
because they'd be living and thinking as their individual selves

What better way to solve your own problem
than doing it your own way
if people offer their solution
say, "No, you're not me.
I am not a character in a book
and you are not the author of my life
you are not the director of my scenes
you do not suffer the consequences of my actions
you cannot and will never solve my problems."

Nihilith

Nihilith is no Life and no Death
existence is imagined with every breath
never to realize there is no rest
in the constant sway of the eternal crest
a never ending quest

A revolving circle that changes shape
A weaving path that changes its fate
never to realize that it is fake
molding figure formed to create

Once called master of heavenly disaster
now called projection from a controlled simulation
Another considerate interpretation
not a delusion leading to confusion
but another conception straying from desolation

Nihilith, Nihilith
no Life, no Death
Imagined breath
Imagined Life
Imagined Death

Even God would confess
A created mess
and a created rest

Can't know or realize what is next
thinking about it would make one vexed.

Tyrannical paradise

If God meant no desire for the mind to be free
then why did he make stand the apple tree?
Adam was made first
a known terrible curse
to be roaming alone in his own verse
then feeling despair
wouldn't have God known or cared?

Second came Lilith
the first true love from whence Adam cometh
and happy and thrilled Adam became
until him and Lilith realized they were the same
both dominant in thought and action
she became spiteful and profane
declaring both Adam and God insane

Adam stood in Paradise alone again
crying to God that his life was a shame
and God forbade another women to Adam's equal shade
then Adam proclaimed, "If not you provide and get me laid
I shall pleasure myself and consider your debt paid."

"Fine. FINE!" God proclaimed
"I will not let you be defamed
but take your rib from your side
and make a creature lesser than your pride."
Then came Eve, formed from Adam's side
and unlike Lilith, more zombified

Lilith, in her desert bliss, became jealous and basically pissed
saying, "What new whore is this?
I will get my vengeance. Oh, yes, I will
by tempting that bastard and slut to acquiring the knowledge of
HEAVEN AND HELL!"

Reliable Havoc

A dishonorable ruler that is honored
by the people who don't realize their cornered
by the lies which lead to a delusional havoc
a reliable panic

Another Joker's trick
proves that he's really a prick
a labeled homophobe that nightly sucks dick
then the next morning says it was a pussy he licked
Sometimes knowing it's a lie is what makes you sick

The lying ruler gives you a vaccine to clear your mind
and the side-effects are not so kind
the next day you wake up you think you're still asleep
but you're forever blind

No third eye could ever escape
because there is no point for a cure
for it is now too late

Joker loves the havoc
loves the panic
and most of all, loves the suffering of the planet.

Dealythe

To become the end that is oblivion
is like the commencing of conception
as if to once again
live the life the same
arrive to a world of celebration

Eyes close, not knowing where light went
or where the life was spent
to any defining extent
no time to realize the futility
in attempting to repent

Eyes open that are not the same
but are ready to receive the perception
of all happening's creation
where the concept of a before and after
may not be the conclusion
of entering the end of oblivion.

Medicinally Methodical

Every and all day
you take the pills and hear what I say
If you don't swallow to change your mood
it's okay
because it's in your food

I am devilish and methodical
medicinally METHodical
You think it's tropical and natural
when it's really METHodical

Hear what I say
believe all I say
because of what you swallow all day
All that I rule, all that I survey
is all molded in my way
because of the pills you swallow all day

If you don't comply and change your mood
it's okay
because it's in your food

I am devilish and methodical
medicinally tyrannical and METHodical

Maybe the next one to rule
won't seem so cruel
won't admit to you fools
how we turn you into tools

We are evil and unjust
easily molding society without much fuss.

Desire on fire

One may believe that the true resistance
is in all who remain in constant persistence
to strive to remain in existence
though in holding it in precedence
it may lead to other's death sentence

I look into your eyes
and what's reflected is my own lies
of keeping lit the light of your lives
For I am the dictator
the ultimate faker
that deceives you to believe
that it's my desire you truly need

Oh, Rebellion, the real enemy, Rebellion
how it is better to compare you to Satan
for if the fools thought you were the Angel of Justice
then it would be the end of my deception

My desire is a fire
my words that of a liar
my peasants yell them in a choir

Oh, Rebellion
you are the water that one day may do away my desire
but in my own defense
I will submit to my future death sentence.

Motha Land

Beginning the end with recession
to another great depression
Stupid, crazy aggravation
Can't we find a better plan for our Motha land?

Grow the big green plants
to feed cranky old gramps
and all the rest annoying pests

Stupid, crazy aggravation
another recession
to another great depression
ain't ever grand
in horny Motha land
but how else could there be fans?

Stupid, horny pests
they fuck up all the rest
after sucking off the breast
Another generation I can never stand
in our Motha land.

Motha Land
you are so lovely and grand
I promise a better plan
for you, my lovely
Beautiful
Motha Land

Another commencing of recession
to again, a great depression
Stupid, silly aggravation
To Hell with another generation
Not again
I can't stand
this same horrible plan
For our poor Motha Land.

Plundered History

Stealing their History
plundered ideas to keep misery
Righteous light blurry

Realization
Revelation
always used in convoluted confusion
for favor of ultimate delusion

Plundered History
Plagiarized Destiny
Same old misery

Stealing their History
in favor for a fool's glory

Realization
Revelation
disproportion for greed and misguided creed
Constant convoluted confusion
for favor of ultimate delusion

Another trend from a repeated blend.
Will there ever be an end?

Here comes the masquerade

We arrive at the masquerade
it is a place to go when we can't get laid
where we go to masturbate
after we realize we can't control our fate
it is here where we attempt to bleed the bate
that attracts us before it is too late.

Never in seclusion
because we join hands and believe the delusion
In this we raid
what we will be paid
which will be our final grade.

My resume says, "He had not obeyed."
For I have my own masquerade
where I steer clear from the delusion
make my own explanation
no need for masturbation
where I get laid, and I say,
"Fate has obeyed."

And if I want, I command light to fade.

Tortuous Plague

The real plague is in their mind
the worst of all mankind
Blood's turning shut sensibility
reverting for the best fantasy
from the course reality.

To what is learned
but is not discerned.

My perception sees through the veil
of lies and deceit through countenance.
They said I was to be a prince
then realized my insignificance.

From what I learned
the truth was received and earned.

Relief is what I'm feeling
when I stood from obedient kneeling
and left from their worship
to go on my own trip.

Some say; Some said

Swaying our way to the bottomless bottom
praying to no one
hoping for what's never done
drinking our lord's blood to speed up the fall
even if it causes us to climb up and over the wall.

Some say some said

Humanity was to bring glory to all living
open the doors for striving against nothing.

Let it come as I come
Let the end come as we come.

Some say some said

One idiot can eliminate the conflicting ejaculate
with words immaculate
to ears eager for it.

Some say some said

Swaying to the bottomless bottom
is the best thing to do
Praying to nothing for someplace to go
in the end
when we end
let it come
as we come.

Being Un-American = Being a true Patriot

There's nothing more American than being Un-american
Why feel the need to explain
again and again
the feeling of disdain?

For your fellow countrymen
who say again and again
how they all hate the Mexican
for wanting to be American

Didn't the European
come to the land of the Native American
and steal their land
for the great plan
to free themselves from the evil hand
of the kingdom land?

To truly free ourselves
we must learn the reason why we hate ourselves
read the history that is written in books stacked in shelves
advance our conscience and our souls
to keep our minds from turning into coals

Why care if a flag is burned?
Isn't that the freedom our founders yearned?
Why care if it is raised and praised
considered all the rage while others say their locked in a cage?

In only words, Yin and Yang
are equal and the same
Know and accept this to remain sane.

Feel love, DAMNIT!

You seem so lonely
sad and dry
in our land of perpetual cries

Broke and bored
numb to life
feeling nothing, not even by the knife

I want you to see me
See how you could be free
in our land of living seas
See my dark view of living lies

Come on
Baby
FEEL LOVE! DAMNIT!

See me through to be
one of no misery
Be who you will be
in your life I show you liberty

FEEL LOVE!
in soul
I will bring to you all you can behold
Never trying to be denying
a life of glee
a life that is free

FEEL LOVE! DAMNIT!

Cannibal Politics

You think they don't know you
but they do
They plan to seek and kill you
bringing your brethren to very few
They'll take a sword to your mind on down to love
Hands in you without a glove
Eating
Eating
Pulling tricks with Cannibal Politics

Holy Hell on a summer night
fire burning at it's feet so bright
So bright
Moloch breathe in smoke
Moloch breathe in our soul
Moloch, you dumb shit, breathe in nothing
on this summer night
So sick is the ritual of Cannibal Politics

Corporate Gods praising loud
Even though God is not proud
on this summer night they burn us alive
to the point we cannot strive
though we remain alive
in this sick act of Cannibal Politics

Manic Comedy

I am a former man of constant sorrow
feared the day that was tomorrow
the day came where I desired new self-esteem
For the asshole was so mean
he felt eager to be supreme in a house that wasn't his
I felt tired and feathered in that place
where I could not agree with unanimous grace.

This was the beginning of my summer of joy
where before I just would play with a pointless toy
For those who were all very alike
that sought power in all delight.

In this summer I seemed well redefined
in most loving sublime
with friendship in night and day
it is what began
BEGAN this play
this scene I lay
in former rhyme and modern way.

They wanted me innocent, and pure, for sure
but only in their eyes I am not
For pure to them is no real cure.

They wished me God and Hell fearing
and sometimes simply mentally disturbing

In the end... well, find out in your reading
so you'll get my meaning
For my chosen sword makes not blood turn red
my pen runs black and my words make assholes dread.

House of 69

Remember the house of 69
May it be yours and may it be mine
Where she wined and dined before I walked in the door
Where we explored each other, my true desire
for truth and real joy
For I was her boy
I explored she, and her me
in the house of 69
They say she a nice piece of ass
And I say she deserves my good grass
The critics never made me stress
For I was happy in the house of 69.